Ok, I am almost mid-way through my pregnancy and have just begun to feel mild movements where my tummy lies (or rather where the baby lies!). And I must admit, its a great feeling. Even amidst all my doubts and conflicting thoughts about this unplanned baby, the slight activity inside has stirred a lot of positive emotions of affection, love and wonder within me.
Ofcourse my body has slowed down physically, but emotionally and mentally I feel extremely active and charged up. The result? I am intent on doing and trying things which i had planned to for very long. For example:
Ever since i started baking the basic cake with my first OTG a decade back but lost touch due to my academic and professional commitments, i had vowed myself to get back to it asap. Not that my professional or personal commitments have taken a dip in the last one month; but I made sure that I take some time off for trying out the seasonal cakes. This has led me to bake almost 30 pounds of cakes in various flavors. These included the traditional chocolate mud cake with truffle cream icing, the seasonal carrot cake with cream cheese frosting and the orange cake and last but not the least the Rich Fruit Cake which has taken away the trophy with admirers across states.
The year Nick was born I had got some yarn and started crotcheting a shawl. The pace went down and the activity eventually disappeared as Nick grew more active. But around this Diwali, I decided that this shawl will have to be used this Winter season and thus with a relay effort between my mom-in-law and myself, we were able to complete it. I am going to use it next week when I visit my parents’ place in North India next week.
The uncountable conflicting thoughts about having a second baby, having to leave my job almost drove me nuts. relief saw some dawn when my mentor ASB of Pikturenama suggested that I start penning my experiences in the form of a blog. Once I had registered the name MommyTincture on WordPress, it still took some 15 days to formulate my thoughts and finally start posting. Thanks ASB for the idea and encouragement.
And Ofcourse my Job
Can’t forget that I still hold a place in an organization that expects me to deliver on my KRAs. Though I have been privileged enough to have flexi-timings in the office, I am still squirming through a whole lot of tasks to be completed before I call it quits. Also, there is a lot of emotional combat as I work towards closure of a significant chapter of my life.
And in all this there is this little monster who needs constant attention and care-taking that is fun and exhausting both at the same time. Wooff !
I hope this positive turn of energies sustains itself throughout my pregnancy and thereafter. I am going to need a lot of positivism to prepare for full-time motherhood and keep up with stuff to keep the rest of me alive and living.